CUTTER CONSULTING GROUP

E229: All You Have To Do Is Ask, with Dr. Wayne Baker (Part 3)

January 16, 2024


How can a clear sense of purpose and direction positively impact one's journey towards success?


Now is the time to ask for what you want.


This is the last segment of my conversation with Dr. Wayne Baker – a champion on a mission to empower power to ask for what they want. 


Of course, this is completely applicable to the challenges that most salespeople encounter, within their own minds.


And I am not just referring to asking for that sale. 


I mean asking for what you want in your career – training, opportunities, advancements, mentorship.



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  • Show Transcript

    Jason: Welcome to another amazing episode of the sales experience podcast. This is the final part three of my conversation with the fantastic, powerful Dr. Wayne Baker. He is such a great person to talk to. I had so much fun chatting with him and getting connected with him. At the end, he's going to share his links, best resources, best way to get in touch with him, his material, and hopefully move forward in your process of asking for what you want, which is so valuable in life and in sales and everything that you do.


    Here you go. Part three, enjoy.


    Three or five years down the road, what does success look like for you? And actually write it out as a narrative, vivid details. As if we went forward in a time machine and you were showing everyone of all these great things that had happened, if you've got that in mind, then you can start backing up from there and say what do I need?


    What do we need to ask for?


    Dr. Wayne: And that is great because one of the things that I focus on, even before I get into sales strategies or processes with teams is the why, like, why are they there? What would they put on their vision board? Have them actually make a vision board so that they can have that reminder.


    Because I think what you said is correct. For most people, it's that fear of rejections, the fear of failure, fear of looking bad. This crazy primal lizard part of our brain that still thinks it's in survival mode. And it's afraid of being kicked out of the tribe of humans by some kind of rejection.


    Because if you got kicked out and left behind as the tribe moves on. You're toast like that's it and so our brain still thinks that and it's afraid and what I focus on which I think is great. I think your exercise is brilliant. The other one that you hear a lot is write your eulogy of Looking at it and for sometimes that's way too far in the future and that's too big So I like your idea of three to five years.


    What is that? Vision of success, but understand why you're doing what you're doing. What's important to you really? Why you get out of bed. I think a lot of people just float through life and they go through the motions and they're not clear on why they want to do it. They're just checking boxes as they move along.


    And if you want to be successful, especially in sales, and you want to get past rejection, short term long term, you've got to understand why, and then you've got to make sure that why is much bigger. Then those fears or those concerns,


    Jason: You mentioned rejection or a no, you have to train yourself to look at that as information, right?


    And a no information. Yeah. Could you say, sometimes say, okay, that's fine. But could you tell me a little bit more about why you said no? You might learn that they said no, for some reason that you never even thought of.


    Dr. Wayne: Yeah, you just assumed. Yeah, you just assumed, right?


    Jason: That you knew why they were saying no.


    And it could just be that the timing was bad or it was the wrong time in the budget cycle, but come back a month later and they'll say yes, right? So sometimes following up with another request, another ask, which is a polite why to the no that they received. And to think of every no as a lesson with information that you can use to make a better request the next time.


    Dr. Wayne: And that goes back to what we talked about earlier on, which is that open, curious mindset of success, where you want to know more, you want to grow, you want to learn and understand because all of it is just bits of information to help you change or grow or become more of who you are and improve. Again, going back to that game footage analogy, it's that same thing, right?


    Asking that person who just told you no. Like why in a nice, empathetic, caring way, not in a defensive, like argumentative way, which doesn't work that people do, but it doesn't work. Asking them with the right intention and then getting that feedback. If you're doing that and you want to know it so that you can just improve, either you want to improve that relationship or you want to improve yourself.


    Maybe there was something you missed in that conversation that next time you could do better. That's really the people who win. More in those interactions.


    Jason: Yeah, absolutely. But I think that's part of the mindset and with these kinds of tips and practices that we've been talking about. I encourage people to have a list of these and try some experiments.


    Try some things out. The next time you get a no, pause, take a deep breath and say, okay, politely, could we talk about why? So that I can learn from that. And most people don't like saying no and will be happy to say yes to the next request, right? Which is, help me learn, help me understand, right? So that should be an experiment that everyone should try.


    Dr. Wayne: Yep. And One of the things I used to do and I train reps on is when somebody says no, if they're a perfectly qualified prospect, that should be a customer on paper, it's a perfect fit. They have problem X. You have solution X. It's a perfect marriage. They said no. Those are the ones where you want to ask.


    And I do it from that empathetic place. Like we've been talking about, which is, Hey, Bob I understand that you said, no, I'd love to find out more because it seems like this would be a perfect fit for you. And it seems like we both agreed. And I just really want to know, because if it's something that I could do better next time, I want to make sure the next person I can help.


    I'm successful in helping, right? Even if this is a hard no and Bob's never going to talk to me again, I also want to know because I don't want to miss a chance like that if it's something I could do. Yeah, absolutely.


    Jason: And do it in a way that you're not trying to manipulate them into saying yes now, right?


    It's the hidden objection that they didn't say the first time, but it's true and it's done in a true and authentic way that you really do want to learn. So that next time with some other person, you could be a little bit better.


    Dr. Wayne: And you also have to watch out because I mentioned this too, is it's the tone, the attitude and the intention, which is why I brought that up earlier too, is what sometimes what happens is what do you mean though?


    Do you not want to save money, Bob? What is it about this that you don't like that's just going to cause somebody to dig their heels in more and make it worse. So it's really that whole reason why the, your M right, the meaning.


    Jason: Or you say you can't say no because if I close this sale, I'm going to top the leaderboard.


    Yes, because then it's all about me, the salesperson and not about the other person.


    Dr. Wayne: Yeah. You can't say, no, we got to figure out a way to do this. It's the end of the quarter and I've got to make my numbers. So tell me what it's going to take to get this deal done. That's a terrible start to a relationship, even if they say yes, because now they own you.


    And you're in trouble.


    Jason: Not only that, but they'll never fully trust you again either.


    Dr. Wayne: And I see that again, obviously this is a podcast for people in sales and sales leadership, but that in all walks of life, in relationships, personal and business, people trying to get a job, people interviewing and they're desperate for a job.


    And they make those kinds of statements or concessions. And then they start off that relationship poorly as well. Hey, it's Jason here. We'll be right back to the podcast. But first, are you ready to change the way you view your selling role and become a sales professional? Do you have a team that is hungry for new ways to improve and grow?


    If so, I have various coaching and consulting programs available that might be great tools to help you achieve your goals. To learn more about the ways we can work together and to book your free sales power call, go to jasoncutter. com. Now let's get back to the episode.


    Jason: I'm a professor and I teach people in business school, mostly MBAs.


    Teaching is an act of persuasion. It is. I'm trying to get them to think differently about something that they do and to experiment and to try some things out. And as you said, everything sales, I say that, I'm trying to sell them on an idea that will be helpful for them. I have to put myself in their shoes is what their age is, where they're working, what their family constraints are, et cetera, et cetera.


    And think about, okay, from their point of view, what would be useful? What needs do they have? And then I could tailor what I'm saying, my lecture, or you could call it my pitch, right? I could tailor it. So that they see how it will work and that would benefit from it rather than saying here's a lecture about all these things that you take from it.


    I see my job is to make it easy for them to benefit from things that I've learned.


    Dr. Wayne: And two things that are awesome with that is before we hit record when we were talking about it. You said, Hey, I'm not in sales and I've not been a sales person. So I'm not sure where we want to go with the conversation.


    And I said, this will be great anyway. And obviously just like everybody, I think, and you probably agree, you are in sales more than you think. You just don't have title of sales and you're not trying to get credit cards or payment information at the end of the conversation, but you're selling something like you said.


    So I think that's awesome. And I think you are in sales. And obviously if you do what you do at the level. that you're at, you're successful in selling, persuading and getting people to make that change. And it's fascinating to think of that role in school, which I've never thought of from a professor's side as a complete sidebar here.


    Yes, you have warm leads. So you have some people who have come to your class and they're paying for it and they're showing up by choice, right? Like you didn't call them and twist their arm to come have a seat in your class. Like they made this choice and then you now have to take it from there. So it's definitely a warm lead versus a cold lead.


    But to be the most effective professor and get the ideas across, you have to do it in still that, in that smart framework that you're talking about with your ideas all the time. So I think that's amazing. I think that's so cool.


    Jason: And I do have cold leads as well. You do? Yeah, because a number of the courses that I teach are required courses.


    So they don't have a choice. So they're conscripts. They're in the program. They have to take my course like it or not. And so I always say I have a bell curve. I've got, at one end, people who are very enthusiastic about the topic. At the other end, people who are really cynical and unenthusiastic and really don't want to be there.


    And everyone else is in the middle. Most people in the middle sort of saying I'll wait and see. And my job is to shift people up towards the other side.


    Dr. Wayne: And in sales, in my perspective is that's the same thing with prospects is that prospects are all in that bell curve. People are people no matter what.


    And so most sales reps have a pipeline that looks that same or leads that look that same. There's the easy. Mostly referred to as a lay down. There's that person who knows what they want. It's clear they want it. Money's in hand. Transaction simple. There's the absolute no at the other end, which is no matter what you do, you're probably not going to get them to go.


    Then there's everyone in the middle. Your goal is to move them forward if it's a good fit. The challenge is I see a lot of order takers where they're presenting information, they're not persuading, and they're not getting anybody but the easy ones at the high end of the bell curve, and they're not successful.


    Successful. Salespeople using things like persuasion and being authentic. They're moving that group forward at a rate that others aren't. And then that's where the success is. Just like you're talking about with your students.


    Jason: Yeah. Jason, our conversation made me think of another way in which my job as a professor is a job in sales, which is we teach, but we also are required to do research and to publish it like my new book, right?


    You've got to, you have to convince a publisher. Or if you're writing an academic article, the way that it works, a scholarly article, it gets sent to anonymous reviewers in a double blind process where they don't know who you are, so there's no reputation effect, and you don't know who your reviewers are.


    but there are three people are going to independently make a judgment on the quality of what you submitted and make their recommendations to the editor about whether it should be published or not. And in this business, it's the publisher parish, so you've got to do well teaching, but you've got to publish as well.


    And that's a form of persuasion. And I guess it's a form of sales as well.


    Dr. Wayne: It is. Everything is. I love it. I think this is great. And obviously I would love people to check out your book. And I'll put the show notes for everybody who's listening. It'll be on the website. Again, the title of the book is all you have to do is ask because I think that's so important.


    Just everything in life. I've heard you speak a couple of times about this. And yeah, I think it's a valuable tool for everybody. Where else could people go to find your materials? Find information about you, the projects you're working on, the way that you help companies or individuals.


    Jason: You can go to the website for the book where there's a lot of information about the book, but free resources as well.


    So I developed an assessment that's in the book, but there's a free version of it available on the website. And if you take it on the website, the benefit not only is it free, but. You get a comparison to our population of assessment takers. Cool. I have a learning map. Our podcast will be up there after it's published and others as well.


    It's the title of the book. com so all you have to do is ask. com and my contact information there as well. I love it when people connect with me on LinkedIn. When they tell me their story and I hear about, especially if something that I wrote or said on our podcast was helpful to someone, that kind of feedback is very gratifying.


    And also if somebody tried something and it didn't work, I'd like to hear about that as well because that's how I learned.


    Dr. Wayne: That's awesome. Dr. Wayne, thank you for being here and for helping people ask for what they want and achieve more in their life. I appreciate you and your time here and sharing what you're doing with my sales audience.


    Jason: Thank you, Jason. I appreciate the opportunity.


    Dr. Wayne: Yeah, and for everyone listening, like I said, the show notes, all of Dr. Wayne's links will be on the website Cutter Consulting Group dot com slash podcast. You can go there, find everything, including the transcript and make sure to subscribe and like the show.


    Share this with everybody you know. This is a great episode, especially for anyone not in sales because it's all about asking and getting what you want. And as always, keep in mind that everything in life is sales and people remember the experience you gave them.



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By Jason Cutter February 19, 2025
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By Jason Cutter February 18, 2025
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By Jason Cutter February 17, 2025
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By Jason Cutter February 13, 2025
The Balance of Effort in Sales The blogs this week have been about the other person going most of the way. Whether it’s a prospective customer and your salesperson, where the salesperson truly can’t want the deal or make most of it happen for that customer to truly be successful. On the path for that prospect to becoming a customer, they should go at least 51/49. Whether it’s your team and their manager, the manager can’t want the team to succeed more than the team actually wants it for themselves. It’s not scalable for the coach (manager) to run on the field every play to win the game for the salespeople. What about sales ops processes and systems? What about the tools available to the sales team and the ones that are classified as sales enablement? In a reversal of philosophy, I believe the sales ops processes should go 90, the team should only have to go 10. Why Do We Need Salespeople? Let’s start where it matters – what is the point of having salespeople? I know many owners question the need and desire to have salespeople. They are hard to manage, tough to deal with, always want more money (potentially for doing less work and closing less deals), and are very resistant to change. Of course, that is a generalization. Of course, there are salespeople who don’t check those boxes. However, having worked with a lot of teams in a lot of industries, that generalization isn’t completely wrong or unfair. So if there is even a small part of that which is accurate, why would we even mess with the messiness of having salespeople? Of needing to employ and manage humans? The Human Element in Sales We need them. That’s why. Even in 2025, AI and technology has not successfully replicated the requirements of sales – which is about helping a human (prospect/customer) make the right decision and move outside of their comfort zone to buy something new. It still takes your human (salesperson) to persuade that other human. It’s why I say all the time that its not B2B, B2C, Retail, SaaS, etc. – it’s H2H. Sure, people can buy something online or even in a store without speaking to someone. But if it’s a considered purchase where there are options and decisions to be considered – it still takes a human being involved. That means ultimately your human (salesperson) has one job, and one job only – persuade the right prospective humans to buy. Minimizing Distractions for Salespeople Everything outside of that mission, task, focus is a distraction that takes away from their highest and best use. Imagine if we had a surgeon who had to prep the room, prep the patient, schedule the surgery and meetings, and do all the parts of the surgery themselves. Nope – they show up for the surgery and do what they do best. Then they take off their gown, gloves, and walk away to get cleaned up and move on to the next thing. Your goal as a sales ops leader is to support the team with systems and processes that allow them to focus on the one thing you need them for. The human part. It would be amazing if they could show up, talk to people, and make sales happen. Of course, there is more that they (and any professional) need to do before, during, and after the sales conversation. But your goal is to minimize all that. Every hour that your salespeople aren’t selling or doing sales-related activities, they aren’t moving revenue forward. The Ultimate Goal of Sales Ops What processes can you put in place that go 90 percent of the way, where the salesperson can do the last 10 percent? An example would be building an email campaign that runs automatically, and when the right people reply, the salesperson gets involved in getting that person from email to phone call. Another example would be your CRM serving up people for the salesperson to call – leads or anyone in the sales pipeline flow – with all the backstory, research, data, intel needed for them to review it then take action. What can you put into place that takes away as much distraction and effort from your sales team such that they can focus on the one thing you need to focus on – other humans?
By Jason Cutter February 12, 2025
The Danger of Doing Too Much as a Sales Leader Alright – so maybe they don’t need to go 90. In true servant leadership mode, you would go way more than 10% of the way to your team. But you have to be careful, as a sales leader. The inclination might be to do it all for them. To help them close their sales. To make excuses for them to your leadership as to why they aren’t closing more sales. Especially considering the very high likelihood that you are a sales manager because you were a great salesperson in the role that you are now managing. And there is a slight chance that you are a player-coach…so you are leading and selling. This can make it really tough not to want to run out on the field to win the game each time. But that doesn’t scale. That doesn’t lead to increased results. You can only sell so much as one person. Creating a Culture of Ownership So, you need to have people on your team that are coming to you. What does that look like? The pinnacle is a salesperson who doesn’t close a deal, comes to you right away and asks for feedback. They want some critiques as to where they could have done things better, different that would have led to the desired result – a closed sale. That takes a healthy level of ego by a professional who has the ultimate growth mindset. They know there are always ways to improve. They want to improve. And they are willing to risk their ego (and the internal, protective, primal part of our brain that doesn’t want to risk our place in the tribe) by asking for feedback that could be negative. Whenever you can, encourage that type of response. Ensure that the team knows that the team itself, and you as their leader, is a safe space – where the goal is to improve, grow, win and that everything done to support each other is done in that mode. They truly have to feel safe to share their mistakes and to get support in learning how to do more, better. Feedback That Drives Growth Part of this takes team and individual meetings that are actually filled with positive support. That doesn’t mean it’s always positive, motivational fluff. It’s not even about the shallow strategy of the feedback sandwich. Its about being real, honest, and empathetic – meaning “I see you are here, I know you want to be there, I will help you get there – even if its hard and it means saying hard things.” It should never feel mean or abusive or like an attack. But you can give some really direct feedback that will sting that ego I mentioned, but the person will know the intent behind it. The second part is hiring this type of person. Hiring people for the team that wants to win, grow, succeed. And they know that you don’t get better by being coddled, sheltered, or protected. You want people who don’t like the thought of perpetually living safely in their comfort zone. And they are excited about the opportunity to be a part of a team that pushes everyone, empathetically, outside of their comfort zone. Are You Leading or Just Managing? If you find yourself as a leader having to push your team, or going to them most of the time, or most of the way mentally – then they see you as a manager not a leader. They see you as someone who manages them, pushes them, and wants them to do things they don’t want to do. I have written some blogs here that go into what your role should be – as a leader, not a manager. Pulling people along with you, inspiring people, and supporting yourself with a team of people who want to win. Not just those that want to show up, do as little as they can and hopefully go unnoticed (yet – complain about not making enough money and how the comp plan isn’t fair, or the leads are bad, or their schedule means they can’t be successful.) Make sure your team knows that they need to come to you – at least 51/49. They should be asking for help, guidance, training, feedback, and support more than you are having to push it down onto them.
By Jason Cutter February 3, 2025
If you have seen the movie Hitch, then you know the scene. Will Smith’s character (Hitch) is trying to coach Kevin James’ character (Albert) on how to finish out his upcoming first date. He is giving him pointers, one being that if his date fumbles with her keys at the door, it could mean she wants a kiss. So Hitch wants to see if Albert knows what to do – for a good night kiss. Hitch gives him the advice “you go 90 percent, and then wait for her to go 10%” which Albert then asks “wait for how long?” Hitch: “as long as it takes.” Albert leads in, Hitch is holding back to see if Albert will wait, and then Albert goes all the way and gives him a kiss. Hitch gets upset, and says “You go 90, I go 10 – you don’t go the whole 100%.” The Sales Analogy Kissing our prospective customers is not acceptable (just ask HR!). But the concept is the same. You don’t want to ever make 100% of the effort for your prospective customers. You don’t want to be the one who is doing all the work. Fundamentally, it is not good practice to want the deal more than the other person. When you go your 90, you need to wait – as long as it takes – for the prospect to go to their 10. And I would say that you want to go somewhere between 10-49, in reality. How Successful Sales Professionals Balance Effort Successful sales professionals know how far they have to go to meet the prospect where they are, while also knowing how much effort the prospect needs to put in to show they are committed. Where most salespeople get in trouble is they get desperate. They want the sale (kiss) more than the other person and they go the full 100%. Of course, persistence is important. And you won’t get what you don’t ask for (although…if you have followed me for any length of time, you will know I am very against having to ask for the sale). But you also have to ensure that your prospects actually want what you are selling. And they want it for their reasons and their motivations. They are driven to pursue your production option(s). They must go 10, 40, 60% of the way to you. The Pitfall of Chasing Your Prospect Just like courtship and relationships – if you find yourself chasing and one-sided-pursing the other person then it means you want it more than they do. It also means they own you. You are essentially begging them for the relationship – convincing, manipulating, begging, bribing, persuading your way forward. Which means they consciously and/or subconsciously know that they are in control. Because if they say no, you will keep pursuing and offering solutions. In sales – that looks like a salesperson who is calling, emailing, stalking a prospect – making offers, offering discounts and trials, and trying to find any way to make deal work. They are going 90-100% of the way for the prospect, not requiring them to go anywhere towards the agreement. This will end terribly. If they do decide to buy – taking the discount, free trial, taking the sale bait – they will not be happy (since they weren’t bought in for their reasons), they will look for reasons confirming why they didn’t really want to buy anyway, and they will know that they own you. Your company will have to convince them on a regular basis to stay in the relationship. The Right Balance for Customer Ownership You fundamentally need that prospective customer to come to you. Not 100% where you are just an Order Taker. But potentially 51% of the way – so they want it more than you. The more you can get them across that 50/50 threshold, the more they will be a satisfied customer. But remember – at 51/49 – they still need persuading, they still need to understand the value of your product for where they ultimately want to be in their life/business, and they still need your support. They lean in the right amount, you lean in the right amount = sales magic!
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